OH SIRI, YOU CAME AND YOU GAVE WITHOUT TAKING!
A few weeks ago, my iphone unceremoniously met its maker when it slipped through my grasp, splash landing at the bottom of a toilette. I’d stuffed my three wet boys in the ladies bathroom stall at the...
View ArticleMOMMIES SHOULD BE RUNNING THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT
I’m on political overload. Sound familiar? I’m not the first to blog about this. And in truth, this post is an extension of something I wrote a few years ago but never published. But now? Things are...
View ArticleYOU WANNA PIECE A’ ME, FLYING SQUIRRELS?
Here’s a fun fact: Squirrels. They can fly. FLY. All this time you thought they were hanging in a tree, just trying to scavenge for some nuts? No. They’ve been flying the friendly skies. IN.MY.HOUSE....
View ArticleA KINDERGARTNER AND A PRISONER BOTH WALK INTO AN ER….
This is the place where my sad yet funny post was supposed to go—the one I spent 90 minutes on and then deleted by accident because I was geeking out watching and analyzing election results pretending...
View ArticleMUFFIN TOP ROUND UP: A SCHNIZTASTIC WEEK IN REVIEW!
So, first things first. I didn’t win the lottery. THIEVING GOVERNMENT HACK DOUCHECANOES! So it was back to reality. My hubs banged up his knee and is on crutches. That was timely since 5 year old is...
View ArticleMERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU TOO, GROUPON!
Oh Groupon, you shouldn’t have. I would so LOVE a talking, illuminated scale right in time for Christmas. What! The farfignugen! Is that? All a-bout? Surely I’m not the only one eating and drinking...
View ArticleOH WINTER, LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!
I hope everyone is enjoying winter—especially all of you who live in warmer climes you lucky bastards. No hard feelings! Even 4 year old is over it. He asked me “When can we see the grass again?” on...
View ArticleCALLING ALL cold MAMAS! ENTER TO WIN!
Valentine’s Day is fast approaching. With three little kids and almost 13 years of marriage, I’m just hoping hubs will come home from work and sing something romantic to me. “Let’s go Outback...
View ArticleA VALENTINE’S DAY TRADITION—AN ODE.
Happy Valentine’s Day, Muffintoppers! It’s getting to be tradition here—time for my annual ode to the hubs. Cheers! NO, NO, NO, NO, NOOOOOO. Just, NO!!!!!! Roses are red. Violets are not. Bringing me...
View ArticleWE HAVE A WINNAH! AND OTHER RANDOMOSITY…..
SO… We have a winnah of the Honeywell Energy Smart 360 Heater! As promised, the drawing was random: Child labor ensured the process ran smoothly, efficiently, and with the utmost of integrity: AND,...
View ArticleSURGERY FOR THE HUBS? PLEASE STAND BY. HELP IS ON THE WAY.
So, hubs found out last week that he needs to have surgery this week. Don’t bust out your rosary beads or your Buddha or call your Rabbi–it’s totally minor. (Which is why he’s feeling his pulse and...
View ArticleI LOVE THAT DIRTY WATER
There is likely nothing I can say about the horror show at the Boston Marathon yesterday that hasn’t been said already. I was born in Boston. I grew up not twenty miles outside Boston. Raised by two...
View ArticleBON BONS HERE I COME!
And just like that, another school year is almost over. And now that I’m out of my pollen coma (*waves–remember me?), I realize I have tons of fun stuff to look forward to this summer with my three...
View ArticleAN OPEN LETTER TO MY SONS’ FUTURE THERAPIST
Dear Future Therapist Of My Darling Boys, First, I want you to know, my intentions were good. Like many who came before me, once upon a time I was an awesome parent. Perfect even. Before I had kids....
View ArticleENTER TO WIN A $50 GAS CARD. YES, PLEASE!
Are you filling up the family truckster and hitting the open road this summer? (Take me with youuuuuuuuuu!) Stop and Shop is here to help put the swagga back into your wagon. They have graciously...
View ArticleGAS CARD WINNAH, CLAIM YO PRIZE AND RALPH LAUREN, SUCK IT!
I KNOW! This is a skitzo post. First, the gas card winnah!!! Pamela T! Please email me at janet@muffintopmommy.com with your full name and address so I can have Stop and Shop mail your $FITTY dollah...
View Article4-NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO?
FORTY? Forty years ago, Bad, Bad Leroy Brown was at the top of the charts, Archie Bunker curmudgeoned his way into our living rooms on All In The Family, the MRI was invented, Billie Jean King kicked...
View ArticleI’M SORRY, I HAVE A BLOG?
Someone call 911. My blog is on life support. Somewhere between summer ending, school starting, me being on a DIY kick (lock your doors—there is no piece of unpainted furniture that is safe), and...
View ArticleCALLING ALL cold MAMAS! ENTER TO WIN!
Valentine’s Day is fast approaching. With three little kids and almost 13 years of marriage, I’m just hoping hubs will come home from work and sing something romantic to me. “Let’s go Outback...
View ArticleBOSTON STRONG: I LOVE THAT DIRTY WATER
This is the post I wrote last year a day after the horrific bombing at the Boston Marathon. In this past year, I have been in awe of the strength and courage the victims have shown. The outpouring of...
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